Blog #37
Happy Thanksgiving Day
to every one of you. Thanksgiving is a
unique and introspective day where we give voice to all the blessings we
have. We are truly thankful for our
family and friends; I don’t need to tell you that. And as for those that we have lost and sorely
miss, they are blessings as well. “Don't cry because it's over, smile
because it happened.” That’s a quote, believe it or not, from
Dr. Seuss, my favorite poet, and it should remind us to be grateful for the
memories that mean so much to us. We are
also thankful for our own lives.
Yes, we may have health issues -- aches, pains or more serious challenges
– but look at it this way, we’re doing the best we can, we’re still here and we
are way better off than the turkey. And, yes, there are people who
are richer, younger, better-looking. But
we have love and warmth and a wonderful meal to share.
Every year at the Thanksgiving meal, Carol makes us all
recite the things we are thankful for, and I have tried to do that in the first
paragraph. I have read the paragraph a
hundred times and I can only feel it inadequate to express my emotion each year
on this holiday. Forgive my inadequacy
and accept my sincere best wishes for you all. So let’s have fun and carve up that bird!
And speaking of carving, I just read that Germany has officially
declared circumcision an act of “bodily harm” and has banned the
procedure. The article goes on to say
that Germany’s 4,000,000 Muslims and 100,000 Jews are protesting the decision. 100,000 Jews?
That’s all Germany has? I wonder
why. Maybe it’s because the Germans murdered
all their Jews. So now Germany joins San
Francisco in banning circumcision. I
have no axe to grind here (wow, that’s an ugly metaphor under the
circumstances) but it seems that 6,000 years of circumcision haven’t hurt the
Jews much.
Ok, we did the thankful part and the carving
part. Was yours good? Now it’s time for dessert. My daughter Abby has come up with an
interesting discovery – most of the sweet things in life start with C. For instance: Cookies, Cake and Cupcakes;
Candy, Chocolate and Caramel; Cocoa, Custard, Cream and Carob. And, of course, my main sweet – Carol. “It is an extra dividend,” Clark Gable said,
“when you like the girl you’ve fallen in love with.”
Gee,
he’s got quotes from Dr. Seuss and Clark Gable!
What’s the wordy bastard going to come up with next? Settle down now, have
another cookie. What I’m going to talk
about next is the most important part of the holiday – shopping!
I hate crowds and am too timid to shop on Black Friday, and I’m too
technologically backward to shop on Cyber Monday.
They
say Cyber Monday is nifty
Those
specials make buying so thrifty.
Yes
shopping on line
Is
all very fine
Unless
you are older than fifty.
Forget Black Friday and Cyber Monday! We need Senior Saturday where no-one under
65 is allowed in the store, and where we can amble leisurely through the aisles
picking up Senior Saturday Specials on reading glasses, space heaters,
melatonin, Ensure, low-salt potato chips, laxatives and CoQ-10.
It’s almost December now and getting colder. It’s getting so cold, in fact, that today I
saw a politician with his hands in his own pocket. So pack up your golf shorts and canasta cards
and head for Naples or Scottsdale. Carol
and I are staying here, but don’t worry – wherever you are, every Thursday, I
will find you. That is, until I run out
of things to say or until you run out of patience with me. Welcome back, my friends. Hope you are well. I almost said, “Don’t eat too much this
weekend.” But go ahead – eat! It’s Thanksgiving!
And then go to a movie. I like movies. I like to be entertained. What I don’t like is to be depressed. Make me laugh, make me smile, frighten me,
make me think, make me guess, make me cry – but don’t depress me. I can’t watch any more children being loaded
into Nazi freight trains. If I want to
be depressed, I’ll just stay home and watch the news. And don’t charge me a car-payment for a bag
of popcorn. People, can you not go two
hours without a popcorn and soda that cost $14?
I know you can.
And now they have movie seats that recline. Very comfortable! Too comfortable, if you ask me. I go to a movie to be entertained (I may have
said that already), not to sleep. I go
to the Opera to sleep. Just give me a comfy seat, a pillow and a
bunch of Italians hollering their meatballs off, and I’ll be happy as a witch
in a broom factory.
· In 1967, Adam
Clayton Powell, a Democratic Congressman was kicked out of the House for
stealing money from his Congressional committee. In the Special Election to fill his seat, he
was re-elected.
· Robert Byrd,
Democrat from West Virginia, served in the House and Senate for 53 years, and
even though everyone knew he had been a Grand Cyclops and recruiter for the Ku
Klux Klan, he was consistently re-elected.
· Bill Clinton was
accused of a dozen instances of sexual abuse including rape. He was never asked by any Democrat to
resign.
· Donald Trump was
heard on tape bragging of sexual abuse to women. He was elected President.
· Ted Kennedy was
presumed to have killed a young woman in an episode of drunken debauchery. He was re-elected to the Senate every six
years until he died.
I’m
not even scratching the surface, but here’s the punch-line -- it
apparently doesn’t matter what perverted, sheet-wearing, abusive scum we send
to Washington, as long as they vote the way we want. Voters don’t seem to care what besotted, racist,
murdering, lying rubbish represent them in the White House or on Capitol Hill
as long as they protect abortion rights, or protect gun rights, or stop
immigration, or increase immigration or vote for the Supreme Court Justice they
want. Do you think I’m being a little
rough on politicians? Sorry. Oh, and by
the way, Congress just banned nativity scenes in Washington DC because they
couldn’t find three wise men.
Stay
well and have a wonderful Thanksgiving.
Come back next week. I’ll be
nicer. Maybe I should take a pill.
hi
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